Given the multiplicity of problems at home let our charity begin abroad:
- The wall will be built, but not the Trump wall. Instead, the American electorate will erect one hell of a wall btwn themselves and Mr Trump. This Great Wall will be the envy of China, for the workforce will be massive, the charge will be led by a certain Nancy Pelosi, veteran of the House. Mr Trump will throw the mother of all tantrums when he sees quite a different wall staring him in the face. The Yanks will then look up to Mike Pence to use his newly learnt skills to defuse the IED’s being assembled by Trump’s now ragtag army. Prepare to take your oath, Mr Pence.
- Brexit will falter as I’d foretold way back in 2018. After all the false or not-so- true EX-hibits, the People of the UK will Brit-IN at last, after another referendum delivers a most sobering lesson to …I’ll leave out her name if I May.
- Having dallianced with the so-called dark side of the moon with the Chang’e – 4 spacecraft, China’s lunar probes will see brighter days, and will plant hostile radio waves that will steer future American space probes off course. A new space race began on Thursday, 3rd
- Atiku will confess that he’ll be soft on EFCC and will play ball with them for fear of them shining a discomfiting laser into his past
- Amina Zakari will confess that she used to play hide-and-seek with the young Buhari. And that she used to prepare him his favourite tuwon shinkafa with miyan taushe. But that simple confession will then throw IPOB into some confusion. Who really have we got here? What has Sudan got to do with it? Or did someone resurrect from the dead?
- Nigerian will cast away the duo of Buhari and Atiku, and look to the trio of Sowore, Don Duke and Oby Ezekwesili, since the best man for the job (Owei Lakemfa) is yet to indicate interest. Future Hope, enh? Anyway when the trio of Sowore, Don Duke and Oby are weighed on the electorate’s scale, Madam Oby will nick it.
- The novel Imminent River will outperform both the short story collection The Sea Route to Senorita’s Heart and the drama One Day with the Hounds at the book presentation.
- The repentance documents of the National Teachers Institute(NTI) will be accepted by the nation.